3 AM MEME WOOO

[thunder-ace.livejournal.com]

The Oregon Trail Commentary Meme

Ah, who can forget Oregon Trail? It was that one game in elementary school that was supposed to be really educational or something, but everyone was too busy laughing at the horrible ways their friends died. So let's keep up that tradition with a meme!

STEPS:
- Go here!
- Pick a team of unwilling characters!
- Chronicle their misadventures in as little or as much detail as you want!
- Laugh at the misfortunes of other teams!

Comments

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Banking Overlord Zetta and his loyal minions Nanashi, Starfire, Ruffnut, and Alex depart in May, 1848, with 4 yoke of oxen, 1500 lbs of food, 14 sets of clothing (2 of which are just dusk jackets, I assume), 20 boxes of ammo, and 3 spare parts of everything.

GO, BADASS FREAKIN' OVERLORD!

May 4th: Reached the Kansas River crossing.
May 14th: Reached the Big Blue River crossing. Wet supplies cost them a day.
May 19th: Arrived at Fort Kearney.
May 24th: Alex has a snakebite.
May 28th: A broken wagon tongue. Zetta attempts to fix it by yelling at it. This fails. They replace it with a spare.
May 20th: Arrival at Chimney Rock.
May 31st: One of the oxen is injured.
June 17th: Ruffnut has measles.
June 20th: Zetta guns down a buffalo.
June 22nd: South Pass reached.
June 28th: Ruffnut has a snakebite. Stop playing with snakes, guys! Zetta attempts to take vengeance, but slays a bear by accident.
July 1st: Very little water. Hey, it's hot! Fort Bridger reached. Alex apparently drank the wrong water, as he has dysentry. Zetta disappears for a while, then comes back with 2 sets of clothes he claims came from an "abandoned" wagon.
July 2nd: Alex has died.
July 3rd: Starfire has a fever. Possibly due to guilt.
July 7th: Inadequate grass. A thief steals two frickin' OXEN during the night.
July 11th: Starfire has died. :(
July 12th: Soda Springs reached. Zetta spends five days burning it to the ground as a pyre.
July 20th: Fort Hall reached.
July 24th: A wild fruit appears! Congratulations! You have captured wild fruit!
July 25th: An ox wanders off. Three days spent looking for it.
August 3rd: An actual abandoned wagon with one set of clothing found. Zetta is as surprised as the rest of them.
August 4th: Snake River crossing reached.
August 8th: Lost in fog for two days.
August 10th: A thief steals three oxen?! Ruffnut has got to stop taking second watch.
August 12th: Lose the trails, lose two days.
August 16th: Fort Boise reached.
August 21st: More heavy fog costs a day.
August 23rd: One of the oxen has died.
August 29th: Nanashi wanders off. It takes 4 days to find her. What the hell was that, Nanashi?
September 2nd: Blue Mountains reached.
September 6th: Nanashi has typhoid. Shouldn't have wandered off.
September 7th: Nanashi has died. Zetta furiously rescinds her 'worthy rival' status.
September 9th: The Dalles reached. A thief steals 32 pounds of food.
September 10th: One of the oxen is injured. Zetta rescinds Ruffnut's spear privileges.
September 13th: Wild fruit!
September 15th: Willamette Valley! Zetta and his lowly apprentice have climbed to victory over the backs of his lesser minions!

...why doesn't Zetta seem happy?