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"Oh, Goddammit."

Roxie has discovered that she is not, in fact, Roxie, but someone else who happens to be currently occupying her spot.

((In this post—players become stuck in the bodies of their characters on the meatship! Oh my!))

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"Oh, damn it!" Dick's...turning around in a circle, looking over his shoulder. "This isn't fair! I need a mirror to see this ass properly!"

"I'll hold one for you if you'll hold one for me."

Cue Shirtless Anders-in-Zuko's-Body!

"Hell yes, public shirtlessness! I haven't been able to do this since I was like six!"

"Hell yes!" Manda laughs and...well, if Anders is going to go shirtless, is it really wrong for Manda to do so, too? "God, yeah. Me too!" She looks down. "Of course, my chest doesn't look this good, either. What the hell does this boy do? A million push-ups a day or something?"

"Actually, this is the point in time where I kind of wish I was Season 1 Zuko. He had the kickass cueball ponytail, and was totally more ripped. I know the animation style probably just shifted between seasons, but still, it looks like this boy dropped some muscle between winter and summer. Still -"

Anders thumps her manly six-pack with approval.

"Speaking of pushups - pushup contest, yes/no? Normally I'm not a fan of getting sweaty, but in this body? I think I could put up with it."

Manda snorts. "Push-ups? Hate 'em as a rule. But if I get the really nice body? Let's see what he can do, yeah?"

"Awesome."

Anders drops to the floor, and . . .

. . . several rounds of furious pushups later -

"Man, look at these pecs glisten."

"Man, these too!" Manda rubs her hand across her chest, giggling. "They really need to do more art without Dick's shirt on."

Anders giggles too. Because if you're going to be a girl in a manly man's sweaty glistening shirtless body rubbing your sweaty glistening shirtless chest, while watching another girl in a manly man's sweaty glistening shirtless . . . yeah, you might as well live it up!

"It occurs to me that this looks like the start to either a really bad, or really awesome, porno."

Exactly! Why not embrace the absolute cheesiness of the whole situation? Because it totally is.

Manda looks at Anders, then back at herself. "With these two? Awesome. Totally awesome."

"Too bad Zuko is, apparantly, irrevocably straight."

Frown.

"I mean, Me-in-Zuko totally appreciates the glistening man-pretty. But my interpretation of him is just so darn hetero . . ."

So much for that glorious porno! That glorious, GLORIOUS porno!

"Don'tlettheheterosexualitystopyou!Seriously,thisistheopportunityofalifetime!" What? Shana's not going to miss this beautiful, beautiful site. The superspeed thing came in handy for stretching out each glorious second of this.

"Well, I hate to disappoint a fan. And I've already had one session of sloppy makeouts in this body - how about another, not-Dick?"

That high-pitched keening noise you hear? That would be Shana saying "Yeee!" at superspeed.

...but first she has to run away for about half a minute. Being an adolescent teenage boy is hard.

"Hey,you'reheterosexual,myboyherehasn'treallyfiguredoutwhat'ssogreataboutgirlsyetatall.Itsucks!"

"...ohmygod." Yes, Bart is drooling over Nightwing. "ohmygodohmygod.Wow." And yeah, looking at the ass. A lot.

"You know, I think this is supposed to be really, really weird."

Just a second. Dick's getting rid of the shirt. "There. That's better."

"IthinkIloveyou.Canyoulosethepantstoo?Wow.Thatis.Wow.It'sevenbetterinreallife!" And suddenly the whole everything in slow motion thing is reeeeeally not as bad. This moment can go on forever. Bart's not complaining.

...okay, maybe it's a little weird.

And. Oh. Boy's body. Teenage boy's body. Awkward. "YeahI'lljustgoawayforalittlebitberightback!"

Dick's totally not snickering. Toooootally not. "All right. I'll...see if I can figure out how to get these damned things off at the same time."

What? It's not like Manda doesn't want to know what it looks like, too!

Shana spends a few awkward minutes trying not to think about the fact that she is a fifteen year old boy and also figuring out what to do with a penis and comes back. "Sorryaboutthat.I'manadolescentboy.Thisisweird.IhatedbeingfifteenwhenIwasagirl!Atleastthere'snohighschoolformetodealwith."

Oh, Nightwing's still shirtless and guh.

"Dude. Trust me, it looks awesome."

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