Meatpile of Mystery! (Open Crack Threading!)

[whitewolfzita.livejournal.com]

(Inspired by silliness in chat and the not!kink meme)

Your character(s) went to sleep in their usual cubby hole in the sleeping halls.

All seemed well and normal.

But this? This is weird. They wake up to find themselves in a pile on something soft, entangled with various other crew members.

The natural response, I believe, is "What the HECK did I do yesterday?!"

At least most of you are fully clothed...

(Yes, there is a perfectly innocent explanation for this. But your characters don't know that.)

Comments

[ihatefleshyones.livejournal.com]

A head on a telescopic neck extended until it was between the two of them.

"So, tell me, which one of you miserable fleshbags was the one who received the pleasure of my sexy robot body? You left a rather sticky and disgusting mess all over it. Be a good pet and lick it clean."

[totalbabemagnet.livejournal.com]

"Stacy?" Ok, there was a girl involved. That sounds better.

"Whose Stacy? Is she cute?"

Oh, wait... other dude.

"Did we have, like, a devil's three-way?"

[gogopowersuit.livejournal.com]

"What?!" Samus steps backwards from the robotic head. And she gets an idea that doesn't involve punishing Grif with bodily harm.

"It was Grif."

[kang-cross-time.livejournal.com]

Kang stopped to examine Kate for a moment. She was a bit younger than his usual tastes. Actually, far younger.

"How did you get into this party? Did a younger version of myself invite you?"

Because he totally would have.

IGNORE ABOVE COMMENT I AM TAGFAIL QUEEN

[morphitudinous]

...Startled, Billy makes an attempt to retreat, only to land face first on something for a moment before forcibly pushing through---is that ground he can prop himself up on? Good. He tries to calm his heart a little, still breathing hard. His words are slightly slurred by the rapid pace.

"I-I'm as curious as you are. My last memory is settling in to sleep, and if anything untoward happened I am unaware of it. I can't judge for certain without the benefit of clear vision, but I believe a fair number of our crewmates are similarly displaced."

At least those green blobs had better be crewmates. The blur that had just jumped at him isn't helping his fears any.

[staturity]

There was really only one thing Cassie could say right now.

"What the hell?!"

[nothawkingbird.livejournal.com]

"That's what I just said, and the only party I remember was a funeral. Yours."

Kate glanced over at Cassie as she struggled to wake up more. Also standing up and away from creepy Kang would be nice right now.

[ihatefleshyones.livejournal.com]

"Very well. Bring your slimey tongue this way, meatsack."

A hand also extended to grab Grif by the shoulder and pull him towards a really disgusting fate.

Re: IGNORE ABOVE COMMENT I AM TAGFAIL QUEEN

[likeapoison.livejournal.com]

Both Toxin and Pat continue to peer at Billy for a moment, trying to process that through a thick cloud of 'whut?'



"That he has no clue, and that it looks like it happened to a lot of us." Pat moves, trying to avoid stepping on anybody. "The last thing I remember is sleeping, too-not that it helps much." He frowns. "Just one more weird thing?"

[telekinetic_badass]

"nngh... stop mmkin so much noise, princess... too erly"

A likely completely unfamiliar hand pulled her down back into the flesh pile.

[kang-cross-time.livejournal.com]

He paused to look at Cassie.

"I suppose my younger self invited you too. I would have invited the twenty-five year old version of yourself. You grow up to have quite an amazing rack."

He stated that as a simple fact, then walked on.

[governmentninja]

Leon rubbed his forehead.

"Why were we relocated in our sleep? And tell me we didn't do anything other than sleep."

[staturity]

"...WHAT THE HELL?"

[morewildcherry.livejournal.com]

"We didn't... did we?"

The concern could pass for horror, really.

[imperious_lex]

"If we did, I was magnificent. Do tell all your friends."

[scarlett-flames.livejournal.com]

Jean groans, but feeling someone's hand rubbing on her ass, her eyes shoot open. That was SO NOT Scott's hand, and she didn't know who's it was, but they were about to be in a world of hurt.

"Hey! HEy! Hands off!!!" She snaps, her elbow flying backward in an attempt to 'nudge' the offending hand away.

[not-prncss-tldr.livejournal.com]

And at that Lafiel scrambles away a little and looks embarrassed. Our tsundere space princess is totes a virgin.

[nothawkingbird.livejournal.com]

Kate jerked her hand away from the unfamiliar hand, and nearly kicked him, "Hey! Hands off!"

"What's going on around here?"

[morewildcherry.livejournal.com]

Now make that real horror, but she's not going down embarrassed, oh no.

"Magnificent by whose standards, exactly? You better believe this'll be one hell of an exposé."

[thexanwhosees.livejournal.com]

Xander yelped, and rolled onto somebody else. Damn, he was having a good dream too. There was Anya and whipped cream. The narration has been ordered not to divulge more on this.

"Ow! Huh?" Maybe he's still dreaming?

[mrsarcastic003]

"Ugh, please don't answer that. I can't unthink that."

[impulsiveflash.livejournal.com]

He so just is not awake. So he curls into a ball against the nearest warm body. Yawning and goes to fall asleep again.

[visserbasher.livejournal.com]

Loren sat up and just stared at this sad scene.

"Oh wow, and I thought my life was weird before."

[scarlett-flames.livejournal.com]

Jean elbows again, just to make sure her point is well made. "Keep your hands off>/i> my ass or you'll be trying to unknot your fingers for weeks to come."

No, Jean's not all that friendly when it comes to the game of grab ass.

[morphitudinous]

The lover of big words almost smiles to himself through the clouds of WTF in his brain. There's something unmistakably familiar about his long-winded sentences confusing people.

"I suppose it is, which would bring the tally of weird things uncomfortably high." There. Billy's making an effort to use smaller words. "Now if I could remove myself from this knot of limbs and retrieve my glasses..." His arm accidentally knocks against Pat, and he recoils. "Sorry! This is proving to be harder than I thought."

Steeling himself again, he attempts to make a crawling step very carefully. If Limb A could move to Point B, maybe he'd have a chance.